Wind Caller
by DNRtone
Summary: A young man feels the call of adventure and goes out to sea to find it. a cool kid got his ass kicked by his brother (that's all there is to say on the matter). a snarky broad searches for another snarky broad. and a forgetful girl looks for her best friend and dog. Kinda One Piece-y but not enough to make it a crossover. all one story BTW. John centric.
1. 1 a young man listens to the wind

**Hello every body.**

**new story... yeah that's just about all i have to say about this.**

**Enjoy I guess? **

**this chapter is a bit slow and boring but its introducing a character that your going to see a lot of so i see no reason to put a lot of detail into it.**

A young man listens to the wind, and feels the rise and fall of the waves as his small boat glides across them. He finds peace in the open ocean and enjoys it greatly. The ocean in turn seems also to enjoy his company. A light misting of water hits his face and clings to his glasses but he does not wide it away, choosing instead to pear through the drops of water with bright blue eyes. The wind whips his already messy hair into increasingly more wild shapes held fast by the salt in the air. He does not mind these things, He smiles broadly in appreciation of them.

He loved the wind and waves and he was quite convinced that they loved him in turn. Throughout all his life they were his only friends aside from his family. They called to him from a young age and pulled him to them. And he had never resisted their call. It was why he did not object to fishing the waters around their island as others in the town had done for generations. However recently the call had grown stronger, he was no longer content with the gentle and known waters of his home. He wanted more than the tame winds and frequent shade. The ocean was calling for him, adventure was calling to him.

He was not currently on the adventure of his dreams but he was content… for now.

At the moment this young man was trolling the deeper waters a few miles out from his home island. His boat sailing with the wind and slicing through the water like a knife. He had been fishing these waters for years now, no longer just setting traps or fishing for small game. When he was finished with the traps he would come out here to fish for larger game.

Speaking of which, the line he had out behind the boat had grown taunt, he caught something. He quickly pulled in the fish. It was a two foot wahoo, making his count for the afternoon three wahoo and one mahi mahi. As fast and powerful as the fish were the young man was more than strong enough to reel even a marlin in bare handed with only minimal effort on his part, years of ship repair and practice made the tasks easy. And he accomplished this all while maintaining his balance on the small and fast moving vessel (this is actually a difficult feet, put a mast on a tiny boat and it can be tipped quite easily). It was a good catch not great but certainly worth a good bit of coin.

Just then the wind shifted, not by much, it was only the gentlest of nudges but it got the boy's attention. Looking up he noted the change in color the sky was beginning to show, night was approaching and if he did not leave soon he would not make it back to port before it fell.

The boy quickly checked the compass and maneuvered the boat into starboard tack with the wind (wind coming from the right), with the bow pointed toward home. Pulling lines and adjusting the rudder the boat began to lean to one side as the wind fully caught the sail. The Boy did not panic, instead he leaned out over the water o the other side of the boat not causing it to right itself but it did keep the little boat from fully tipping. He maintained his position as the boat sped off across the waves, his body leaning out over the water like he was lying on air as he adjusted the ropes with his hands and steered the rudder with a foot, always making some sort of adjustment. He liked to believe he was a very good sailor; he always won the races when he competed, even when he was competing against the veterans.

He made good time; it was only just sunset by the time he docked. Too late to go to market with his catch but not too late to do a little work at the ship yard, he had to go see the foreman about getting an advance payment on his birthday anyways.

Quickly tying up his boat and heading to the ship yard, making it to the entrance the boy was met by a very large man. "Ah, John! If ye'r look'n fer yer pa he's already gone ome." He said addressing the boy, now identified as John. John often thought of himself as a big guy, standing somewhere around 6,3 or so, But _this_ guystill towered over him. He was, for lack of a better word, a giant. This was the boat yard manager.

"No I'm not looking for dad. Thanks for telling me though." John offered. "I'm actually here to get an advance on my pay, seeing as it's my birth day tomorrow an' all. I was gonna take the day off so I came here to log a few hours to make up for it."

"Ah can certainly pay ye, if thas what ye want. I owe ye' fer the pass tree months anyway. An' no many work de yard this late so yer help would be mos appreciated." The man looked back at the yard for a moment trying to find something that could be done without much manpower. "we'r done wit the new dry dock. Why don ye head o'or an finish up the rails." The man handed John an Iron hammer with a long handle and sent him on his way." come see me when yer done wit da' come see me about yer pay."

John arrived at the new dry dock and found a half built rail road leading into the water; it would eventually be used to pull ship up from the water and into the work area. The majority of the rails were stacked to one side, each made of heavy steel. John also noticed that he was the only one here.

John shrugged and started working. Walking over to the steel rails he lifted one in each hand before walking back to the track. Putting them in place he grabbed a hand full of spikes and placed them in the slots.

Lifting the hammer over his head John then brought it down with enough force to drive the spike entirely into the cement underneath in a single stroke. This level of strength did not come from his life as a fisherman this came from his dad, who had taken it upon himself to teach John the ways of many strength. John was nowhere near his dad's level of insane strength but he was still stronger than even the boat yard manager despite the difference in size.

He did this again with the other spikes before going back to grab more rails. He repeated the process several times until he reached the water. He hadn't taken him very long, maybe an hour and a half. The rail wasn't finished, but the tide was in so the other workers would have to finish it in the morning tomorrow. The only drawback he had was breaking the handle of his hammer (he had to grab another one).

Waking up to the big man who handed him a good sized pouch of coins. "'ere ye' are. Four monts pay. Since it's yer birth day ah' thought it'd be nice tah' give ye' an advance on de' mont'"

"Thanks!" John said cheerily. Though he did feel a little guilty and it showed nothing a little misdirection couldn't hide "I broke the handle on one of the hammers so I'm taking it home to fix it. Is that alright?"

"s' long as ye' bring it back." He replied.

"Alright, ill drop by tomorrow." With that John left on his way home.

By this time the sun had fully set, the lamps on the street were in the midst of being lit, and their illumination could be seen on one side of the bay and extending a short distance away from the harbour. It was a small town. Full of fishermen primarily and the odd shipwright or two but most of the fishermen repaired their own ships john had to do so since he was eleven.

He walked a ways out of town to the house he shared with his father. The house like all the others was made of brick but it was rather large for a fisherman's house. John always just attributed this to good banking. Entering the house he was greeted by the sight of a large cake and a note. For a fisherman John's dad did a **lot **of baking. John was just grateful he didn't try and combine the two professions.

Instead of dwell on the rather disturbing thought he decided to see what his dad had to say by reading his favourite mode of communication, the pride filled note.

_Son_

_If you are reading this than I am not in the house_

_I had some serious business that needed dealing with_

_You're a strong young man and will do fine without me_

_Just know that I am so proud of you._

John wasn't too torn up about his dad being gone for his birth day. He had been planning to slip past his dad and run away out to sea anyways. Not that anyone needed to know that. Tomorrow he was going to start his journey. It had already been stated that the pull of the sea was strong on young John Egbert, and who was john to deny the sea. He did feel a little bad about deceiving him though.

-Time skip- next morning

The sun had yet to rise and john had everything together. A large pack of dried fish and bait, a bag with his clothing, the coin he had been saving for the trip, and a chest with all the tools of the prankster. Sure it was a lot but he held all of this fairly easily. He had already taken all the lines and tools he would need down to the boat.

He was about to leave when he saw the hammer he had repaired the night before. It had solid iron head and a long handle thicker than the original so it wouldn't break so easily, it looked reliable. John debated with himself for a minute. He was already going to be a runaway but did he want to be a thief as well? He thought about it until he came to the conclusion that he would need it. There were pirates out at sea after all, and it would probably be best if he had a reliable weapon. Sticking the hammer in a loop on the side of his bag he walked out the door and into the sleeping town.

John made his way down to the boat, taking care to stay in the shadows. He didn't want any witnesses to his escape. It would make finding him too easy. John went unnoticed despite his large size and the racket coming from his luggage, this was probably due to the face it was only 4 in the morning, he had about an hour to get going before the town woke up. The day starts early for a fisherman but not that early.

He made it to the pier without any difficulty just as the sky started to show hints of sun, lighter blues and purples. He quickly stashed his things in the compartment at the front of the boat before checking over the rigging and uncovering the sail, he doubted anything was faulty after only one night at rest but it was better to be safe than sorry.

By the time he had sailed out of the bay the town the barest corner of the sun could be seen and the town was ever so slowly waking with its arrival. John didn't notice this all he noticed was the wind in his sails as he started his grand adventure on the high seas.

Just then he noticed a piece of paper that was attached to the inside of the sail. Reaching over he found a note, John was more than a little shocked at the contents.

_Son_

_If you are reading this than you have started your journey_

_I know you will do great things_

_you are a strong young man after all_

_Son, I am so proud of you._

-elsewhere-

On a rock out cropping a man stood watching a lone boat sail into the distance. A tear of fatherly pride slid down his cheek as he looked on in approval.


	2. 2 pirates

**Back again. fell free to review and all that.**

**this chapter is starting off with a time skip, get used to it because i will be doing this more than just a little bit Life is long and boring at sea and months can pass with nothing happening. this will become less the case as the other characters start showing up and things actually start happening but for now we'll just be skipping along.**

**so enjoy.**

-6 months later -

John sat in the crow's nest of a rather large merchant vessel. His adventure in the tiny fishing boat he started out in had not lasted very long but he was still on an adventure none the less. For the past six months he had been sailing back and forth across the seas on various merchant vessels but not many of them were willing to venture beyond the boundaries of this plane. He was having fun but he felt like there was more and once again found himself being called out to sea. It seemed like it was impossible for him to remain in one place for any length of time. Rose would one day liken his condition to a mild form of ADHD. But John does not know who this rose person is yet so whatever she has to say about him can wait for another time.

Regardless of John's thirst for adventure no vessel would take him to one of the other planes and he had no idea why. John would have to wait to get his chance at further exploits, for now he was stuck in relatively familiar waters.

He had found it easy to find work however. He had a reputation with the merchant captains as an able bodied sailor, and among the captains that he had worked under he was almost seen as a lucky charm. John didn't understand that last one but apparently ships don't usually sail through hurricanes unharmed, he personally didn't see anything wrong with it but whatever. As a result he was hired quite easily and crews and captains alike were saddened to see him go.

For the Moment John just sat up high, letting the wind play through his hair. It was a peaceful day. John was not on watch he merely felt like sitting in the crow's nest. He was not the only one; another sailor was also present keeping an active eye on the horizon. John decided to take a nap and closed his eyes in preparation for a long relaxing cat nap.

His dreams were filled with whispers, he identified them as the voices of the wind but didn't really have anything to base this assumption on. He supposed it was just a mysterious dreamy thing. As always they were filled with mirth and playfulness. Innumerable voices whispering all at once like puppies clambering over each other to say hello. Which incidentally is what they were saying

_Hey _

_Heeeey_

_He_

_HEY_

_Hey hey_

_Heeeeeeeeeeey_

_Hi._

_Heeeeey_

_Hey listen!_

_Hey_

_Hey listen!_

It was starting to get annoying…

_Hey hey!_

_GUESTS!_

'Guests?' John thought.

_Guests!_

What…

Suddenly John was woken by a cry. "PIRATES!" the other occupant of the crow's nest called down to those on the deck. Considering that he was right next to John it was unpleasantly loud. He was pretty panicked. John was about to go back to sleep when his comrades words sank in.

_Pirates. That's a pretty good reason to freak out I suppose. PIRATES!_

John scrambles to his feet looking to his comrade to see him practically shitting himself.

He looked down at the other crew members as they scurried about. As large as the ship was the waters in these parts were peaceful and calm, the ship was not at all equipped to take on pirates. The most they could hope to do was out run them.

Out of curiosity John looked in the direction the lookout was frantically waving and saw a Blue ship flying a jolly roger with eight eyes.

_Oh_

_Guests_

The other ship was large for a pirate ship, usually they choose ships for speed but this one was definitely built for fire power. Despite this however it was still faster than the ship john was currently on. And to top it off he knew _that_ ship didn't have to be fast to catch them.

On that note…

John turns to look down at the helmsman who seems unusually calm, like he is spacing out. The helmsman starts angling the ship into the current, slowing the ship to a crawl. Several other sailors seem to be coming to after cutting lines or slashing sails. The deck was in chaos as some of the crew frantically tried to undo the damages and others committed unwilling acts of sabotage.

John jumps out of the crow's nest grabbing a rope on his way down. He swings from rope to rope before coming to rest on deck his feet making a loud BANG as he lands.

A few sailors who aren't trying to keep their companions from getting them all jump at his arrival. They seemed fairly surprised by his display of acrobatics Most would have expected him to hit the deck with a sickening splat and not a commanding boom. John has to admit he thought it was awesome as well.

John ignores their shock as he goes downstairs to find his bunk. He had some things to grab. And his hammer hadn't been used in a while…

-o0O0o-

A young pirate gazes hungrily at the fat and lazy merchant ship before them. She disappointedly reminded herself that they most likely didn't have anything really valuable like gold but it was always nice to get their hands on rum and spices without having to pay for them.

She wished she was more useful. She glanced over at her mother, the feared Marquis Spinnerette Mindfang, who was currently looking towards their prey with a hand to her temple and a vicious smirk on her face. The young pirate was disappointed that she could not affect the ship at this range. Her current range was something close to a couple hundred meters her mother could affect people a full kilometer away far more than enough for their current quarry. She couldn't match up to her mother currently but she was eagerly waiting on the day that she would, then she could sow the seeds of chaos herself. It was a lot for a young woman to look forward to.

Their prey had come to almost a complete stop all that was left was to frighten them into surrendering, not that they had to do much more than they already did but it never hurt to be flashy. That being said…

The 'Mind Fang' opened fire with its main guns heavily damaging the defenceless ship and scaring the shit out of its crew. That done 'The Mind Fang' pulled up to the ship and a couple dozen members of her crew boarded without resistance. The crew of the merchant vessel all got down on their knees and put their hands on their heads, they had given up. The pirates were almost disappointed, but looking at the sailors before them it probably wouldn't have been a very good fight anyway. Some of the crew were muttering about _deviants_ under their breath, the young pirate and several of her crew mates were angry at this and were tempted to just execute them all.

Deviant was a word used for anyone who wasn't entirely human like the Mer and the Djinn. In the case of the young pirate and her mother they were called ash-skins, blue-bloods, or Ice-hearts, but the name they would have preferred to go by Jotenn or High-Northerner. The young pirate was not tall by human standards perhaps a full head taller than most human women, but to her own she was not all that imposing, she was still growing though. Her skin was a pale grey with a slightly blue tone to it anywhere that would have been pink on a human was a light blue on her, her features were obviously those of a woman coming out of puberty. Her mother on the other hand was statuesque, easily standing tall over most of her crew, her skin was so dark it appeared to be the blue-black of the night sky and her lips intensely blue lips framed a wicked fanged smirk. The younger pirate really looked forward to inheriting her mother's figure, she wouldn't even need her powers to control some people then.

Spinerette's face did not show any sign of her anger but she did stab one of the more chatty prisoners multiple times in the face, the whispers quickly stopped. She then turned to an exceptionally tall and muscled Jotenn "Equius get below and check to make sure the crew is secured."

"yes, mistress." He said. Spinerette opted to ignore the mistress part it was just something the young man did. The young pirate found the form of address disconcerting.

He wasn't even gone for two minutes before he came back. It was not this alone that was surprising rather it was how he had returned. He had come flying… through the deck before landing in a heap a little to the left of the young Pirate. There were only two people who had ever handled equius like that. One of them was insane so he couldn't be here so the only other person would be…

A cheery voice spoke as its owner leap out of the hole left in equius's wake. "Hey Vriska, Long-time no see"

_-o0 Flashback time! 6 months ago. 0o-_

_The crew of the Mind fang were bored they had been in the overly calm waters preying on easily captured merchant ships for a few days now, they made quite a profit but it was too easy. There were no storms to throw them off or naval officers looking to see them hang, the waters in this plane were too peaceful. They wouldn't have a chance to leave for their next destination for almost half a year so they were stuck for the time the entire crew just laid around on the deck watching clouds drift by_

_Vriska was entertaining herself with gambling, as always she won. That was literally all there was to say about that, every game, she won._

_The only way someone could beat her was by cheating but she always caught cheaters and she jumped at any excuse to practice her dueling skills. So unfortunately for her no one ever cheated._

_A cry went out that a ship had been sighted getting everyone's attention; there wasn't anything else for them to pay attention to anyway. The crew looked it in the direction the lookout was gesturing which happened to be behind them, the ship was tiny and surprisingly close, the lookout should have seen it before it got that close. It kept getting closer and closer with incredible speed, REALY incredible speed. The lookout had only announced its approach not even a minute ago and it had gone from a speck in the distance to a fishing vessel only a few hundred meters away._

_Most of the crew were flabbergasted for a variety of reasons. First was the obvious issue with its speed, no ship should move that fast regardless of its size or weight, the fact that it did meant something about the little boat or its pilot. The other issue was the fact that the ship was APROACHING THEM, a pirate ship with the jolly roger and everything._

_The boat came up alongside the 'Mind Fang' giving Vriska and the crew their first look at the ship and its occupant. It was a well-tanned Human with black hair. From what Vriska could see he only wore a pair of khaki shorts but didn't make out much more as the boy continued to sail forward before looping around the other side of the Mind Fang were it slowed down to matching her speed._

_The crew rushed to the other side some with weapons at the read._

_As Vriska and the crew arrived at the side they were surprised to be hailed by a cheery voice. She could hear the grin in the young man's voice. "Ahoy there! I thought I would never find another ship, I realy should have figured out where I was going before I set sail. I was almost out of water I thought I was going to die or something. (Shrug) oh well."_

'_**Shrug?' **__the whole crew thought in unison. 'Almost died… and 'shrug''? The crew didn't know what to do about the lad, they had all come to the conclusion that he wasn't dangerous (as far as they could tell) but they didn't really have any point with witch to begin communicating with him._

"_Permission to come aboard?" the young man in the boat asked "I've got some fish I caught this morning if you want some."_

_The crew once again had a shared thought. 'Did he just offer a group of pirates… fish?' The lad was way too laid back..._

"_um… yes?" an older pirate said, almost asked_

"_Oh good!" the man then leaned down and picked up a Marlin that was several times larger than he was. I usually don't keep Blue Marlin but I hadn't caught anything else besides so I kept one of the smaller ones."_

_The crew were baffled 'smaller ones? Did he catch that massive thing and that tiny boat… and where was he keeping the damn thing?' the crew all thought as they looked at the boat that clearly didn't have enough space to hind the massive fish_

_The man stood up with the fish over one shoulder and a rope in his other hand attached to the boat which surprisingly didn't tip before LEAPING onto the deck of the Mind Fang. As the Lad righted himself again Vriska got her first good look at him. He was very tall dwarfed only by Equips but was not as bulky as he was. The Young man had a lean frame and broad shoulders he did not appear weak in the slightest but by no means did he looked strong enough to have made that jump. His hair was black and wild as if it had been wiped about in a hurricane. Quickly securing the rope to the railing he turned to the crew of the Mind Fang. His eyes were blue like the sky, and seemed to have a mirthful shine to them, Vriska blushed slightly. This impression was only strengthened by the huge shit eating grin that adorned his face showcasing slightly larger than average front teeth._

"_So your pirates eh?" the man asked his grin never leaving his face_

'_Oh so he DID know, that was a relief'_

"_I'm John"_

-o0Flashback over.0o-

"John?" Vriska asked surprised to see the goofy adventurer again. It had been Half a year and literally nothing had changed about him, except his hammer which was bigger a good bit bigger than his last one. "What are you doing here?"

"I was having a nap." John said with his bucktoothed grin in place.

"A nap?"

"A nap." He affirmed

"OoooooooK. Why'd you send Equius flying this time?" Vriska queried

"He tried to grab me and he was really sweaty. So I punched him." John said his face scrunching up slightly with something like disgust. "Oh! Hi Vriska's mom." He said with his smile back in place as he saw Spinnerette. Most of the crew were baffled at this form of address.

"Good day John. But please call me Captain Marquis Spinnerette Mind-fang or just Captain Mind-fang." She said with a voice laced with both amusement and irritation at the same time. "Been well I hope?"

"Yep! Been sailing around with the merchants for a while, its kinda boring though."

"Oh I know what you mean." Vriska said "This pl8n is SOOOOOOOO Boooooooooring. I can't w8 to leave." Spinnerette nodded in agreement with her daughter's words

"Your Leaving this plain?"

"Of COOOOOOOOURSE we are." Spinnerette stated. "You didn't think pirates of our calibre would stay in this kitty pool did you?"

"Oh yeah." He said as if he had just remembered something very important. "Can I come?"

The rather blunt question threw the pirates off guard. John's crew mates, who were all confused by his familiarity with the pirates were absolutely floored.

"Fine you'll come aboard and we'll kill these whelps." Spinnerette said with a small smile gracing her lips. They would pay for their insults.

"I'll come aboard and you'll take the cargo but leave the people." John said.

"Oh?" Spinnerette asked "how about we take you aboard and I kill half the people and take three quarters of the loot by volume."

"A third of the people and half the loot by weight." John countered. His once crew mates were looking at him with frightened eyes.

"A third of the people and three fifths of the cargo by volume." Spinnerette shot back. A smirk gracing her lips.

"I go with you, you kill only three people however you take half the cargo by volume and I'll show you were the captain keeps the wages."

Spinnerette stood there with a thoughtful look on her face before making a decision. "It's a deal. Welcome aboard John" She said with a smirk, she did so enjoy haggling. John's previous crew mates had mixed feelings about one of their own bartering with a pirate, with their lives no less. On the one hand they were happy that they would most likely live on the other they had to feel more than just a little betrayed that John did not reduce the death toll to zero and seemed fine with it.

"I'm surprised. You put up more of a fuss about killing the last time Captain ordered ex8cutions. I thought you would deb8 " Vriska said as she came up alongside John. She would not call her mom 'mom'. To her it didn't show enough respect, she was her captain first and foremost.

"Yeah… And she killed them all anyway. I don't like it much but its than better than the alternative." John said with his smile still in place but it didn't quite have the same innocent mirth it usually held. "anyways… the wages. I'm pretty sure their inside one of the log books on the shelf. Let's go grab it so we can depart."

"fiiiiiiiine. Hey John wanna wager your share on a game of cards. I'll wipe the floor with you this time."

"wanna bet?" John challenged in return.

"It's gambling, Of coooooooourse I do." Vriska shot back "Of course there isn't much chance involved, what with you cheating all the time." She accused

"You never told me why you think I'm cheating." Their conversation faded as they went below deck.

-o0O0o-

Several hours later and the Mind Fang was a hive of activity. The crew on watch were busy maintaining the ships full speed, they wanted to get away from these waters, they had spent too long idle. Those not on watch were drinking the rum they had stolen from John's old crew or sleeping in preparation for their own shift. Two people in particular were sitting down for a game of poker.

"GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!" Vriska shouted after 3 consecutive loses, her share of the gold stolen from their last hit was quickly dwindling. "I JUST KNOOOOOOOOW YOUR CHEATING!"

"I am not" John said back in good humour. "I don't have any sleeves to hold cards and you even shuffled this time."

"YOU JUST ARE! I don't know how but you are defin8ly cheating!"

"I'm not cheating. Its magic." He said with one of the world's largest shit eating grins plastered cross his face.

"TH8'S THE SAME FUCKING THING!" Vriska shouted, her face flushing a deep blue with anger "And Magic is make believe fakey bullshit."

"Oh yeah? what about alchemy? I find some of the things they do too crazy to explain with science."

"They use big ass machines and fancy eq8sions an' shit, that outomatically disqual8fies them from the magic thing."  
"they can make boats move without sails or oars or anything though! Tell me that doesn't sound like magic."

"They use these things called engines for that! They, like, burn shit and it makes these weird as metal things spin and THAT moves the ship."

"how does burning things make something else spin? And why would they light a fire on a ship?" Fire at sea was a very dangerous thing.

"Hell if I know! it's stupid but it's NOT MAGIC!"

"Hmmmm. I'm not terribly convinced." John said skeptically "What about the ships that they can sail underwater?" he looked at her as she tried to come up with a rebuttal "can't explain that can you?"

"Egbert if you don't stop I will make you jump overboard." Vriska said bringing a hand to her temple and narrowing her eyes at John

"Your mind thingy didn't work on me last time though." John said simply, obviously unaffected by Vriska's attempts.

Vriska put more effort into her attempt, her eyes narrowed almost to the point of being squeezed shut and a vein was pulsing violently in her temple. John still didn't seem affected. John grew worried about her when her face started a bright blue but before he could he suddenly fell face first onto the deck sound asleep.

Vriska blinked, her eyes tearing up with all the blood flowing to her head, and as it left her head all at once she suddenly became dizzy and fell on her ass. She Rounded on john expecting the big goof ball to be laughing at her but was surprised to find that he was face down on the deck snoring. Not the effect she was hopping for but it would do.

She quickly took back everything john won from her and then some and left deliberately stepping on him as she made her way to her cabin.

Served the cheater right. No one gets one up on her. Now she just needed to figure out how he did it.

**NA:**

**Just to clarify. **

**The 'world' this story takes place in is a collection of smaller worlds (all of which are more or less ocean themed) called planes each existing in the same 'solar system' but at different positions throughout it. no, there is no space travel but there is a 'void' that acts as a divider between them. it will be explained more in depth in the next chapter. Each Plane will be named after the lands the kids go to in the session. the current plane has no name, at least none of importance its just a starting point, think of it as the boonies if you want. **

**As for alchemy it is not FMA alchemy it is still alchemy of the MSPA variety requiring machines and such. they will still do some weird ans mostly pointless bullshit but your not gonna come across someone clapping their hands together.**

**magic will play its role. but most of the bullshit that appens will have a non-magical explanation.**

**yup. looks like that's everything. got to go.**


	3. 3 the unspeakable

The Unspeakable

The whispers, the ones that came in johns dreams, were different. No longer were they filled with joy and unrestrained energy. Instead they were slow murmurs, sounding more like a low howl than their usual swish and whistle, to quiet to discern meaning.

…

…

…

John opened his eyes and was greeted by almost complete Darkness. Almost…

The water was glassy calm and aluminate as if bathed in the light of the stars it reflected, but there was no light to illuminate the ship John knew he was on he could not even see his hand when it was touching his nose.

Looking up he saw points of light and color ranging from the size of a pin head to that of the moon and all in between of every color imaginable and then some colors that had no name. They blinked out of existence, sometimes not to be seen again, or moved in lazy or erratic patters and some even seemed to follow the ship as it apparently made its way through this place. The stars were not bright. In fact they seemed to devour all the light around them leaving everything around them in inky darkness.

John shivered at the feeling of immense disquiet from the sight of the 'stars'. He knew instinctively that these were not stars but eyes, the eyes of enumerable predators. Predators that had no interest in them, but this was only a small comfort. They were surrounded by them even the 'water' was teeming with them.

"Did I die or something. 'Cause I feel like I'm in hell." John said breaking the silence. This comment elicited a few nervous chuckles from the sailors around him; no doubt they were feeling as uncomfortable as he was. So he wasn't alone, that was good.

"JOOOOOOOOHN!" he heard Vriska call to him. "Its a8out tiiiiiiiime you decide to w8ke up." Though john couldn't see hit he sure heard the smirk in her words.

John grinned "you put me to sleep didn't you?" his amusement evident in his voice. He had almost forgotten about all the eyes looking at him. Almost…

"Maaaaaaaay8e~" Vriska sang

"Heh." John laughed a little. "What is this place?"

"This is the medium, the plane all the planes exist on. I don't really know much more than that you have to pass through here to go between the planes." Vriska said. She shrugged but John didn't see it. "You were asleep when we entered."

"So what are those creepy things watching us?" John asked and was answered with a hand over his mouth. John was surprised that she even knew where it was, maybe she could see in the dark? He wasn't sure if Jotenn could do that or not.

"SHHHHHHHH!" she hissed. "don't speak of _them_. Not while they are watching. 8ad luck." She continued in a hushed tone. John would have called her superstitious if it wasn't for the fact he was a sailor and equally superstitious, he also could have sworn that some of the eyes _were_ actually watching them now. John nodded and Vriska removed her hand.

"How long will we be here."

"Another day or so." Vriska answered. "There is no need for you to do anything. There is no wind or tide here. We just travel in the same speed and direction we were when we entered."

"So…" John prompted.

"Just lie around and wait till we arrive pretty much." Vriska answered.

"Oh ok. Goodnight?" John said not entirely sure.

"Might as well 8e." Vriska shrugged again, and again it was unseen. "'Night john" she said as her footsteps receded.

John lay back on the deck, he didn't think he would be able to get below deck without being able to see so he might as well sleep there.

John closed his eyed and felt some minor relief. John would rather have the darkness of his own eyelids than the inky black bodies of the unspeakable things watching him.

**AN: I know its short.**

**I was considering making this part darker, but ultimately i decided to keep with the atmosphere of the other chapters. it is still more sparse than the others. **

**the 'medium' is also called the 'void' and you will see this place a lot more often. once rose is introduced youll get some actual dialogue about the place and the creatures in it but until then... you won't.**


	4. 4 back ally beat down

Chapter 4

Back ally beat down

The usually intense red sun of LOHAC was dim when seen through dark shades. And through these shades the world was viewed with a perfectly expressionless face. These dark lenses made their way through the busy streets of a city carved into dark red stone. They shifted slightly as a heavy basket was adjusted on a shoulder; the sound of metal clinking together was heard briefly.

The sound of geta sandals on the road kept perfect time with the beat of a street performer's drums. Could probably make a better beat while sleeping. The sound of the sandals stopped as they came to rest at the top of some slabs of stone arranged in decreasing elevation, stairs.

Oh, hell no. There was no wayone wearing _these_ shades was going to have anything to do with the things. Call it a superstition or a phobia but this figure's past experiences with this particular method of ascension were down right traumatic. Instead the figure turned into a back alley in an attempt to bypass the stairs.

Several shady figures eyed the basket with some curiosity; the sound of clinking metal drew even more attention. Quite a few figures started following after the basket, it could be valuable after all, the nice cloths only cemented this belief. Five figures stepped into the shade's line of sight blocking the way. The shades turned lightly to the side as seven others blocked the path behind them.

The thugs were all armed with knives and cutlasses, they were a part of the same group apparently bandits or pirates who were just passing through town and decided to make some easy money on the side. The apparent leader had a katana sheathed at his side. "well well well. What have we here?" the leader asked said attempting to be intimidating. It wasn't working. "Why don't yah hand over the basket, kid, and we won't cut yah to ribbons."

The basket shifted so that it came to rest by the shade wearing figures waist, one of his hands came to rest on its lid. "Can you not be so cliché? I mean if you keep this up I'll end up bustin' a gut over here."

The Leader got angry of course. "I'LL BUST YOUR GUT! CUT HIM UP!" he yelled drawing his katana and pointing it towards the figure wearing shades.

The figure started counting in ¾ time as he dodged all their attacks with ease. 1 2 **3.** 1 2 **3. **1 2 **3. **He continued this for several seconds watching as their faces grew more frustrated, they were unable to land a hit no matter how they tried.

The figure's hand flipped off the lid of his basket and grasped something within. He ducked low to avoid a strike that would have taken his head off. Suddenly the beat in his head changed to a compound rhythm the tempo picked up as he drew a sword from within the basket delivering a fatal blow the thug's abdomen. His blade moved in perfect sync with the beat in his head. His movements were no longer the lazy waltz he had used to dodge their initial attack but a fast tango as he stepped and flowed in his enemies' guard too fast to see and too close to retaliate against. In the first few seconds of his assault already five of his attackers had fallen.

The leader decided to join the fight as he and the remaining six attacked at the same time. The beat in the shade wearing figures head changing once more to a poly-rhythm as he drew another blade and lunged at the nearest enemy while using the other blade to block and slide under the blade of one of his comrades. The new sword broke as it met his opponents blade, snapped in half, to most this would be a handy cap but the figure continued forward landing a lethal blow despite the blades shortcomings. He quickly drew another blade from the basket slaying another in the same movement. The two blades moved in completely different patterns but still remained in perfect sync with the beat in his head. He wasn't fighting as if he was dancing like an amateur would have said, no, he moved like music manifest with lethal purpose.

One of his strikes was blocked both blades met before breaking apart, once again the figure continued forward and landed a blow before discarding the newly broken sword and drawing another from the basket. The basket was just full of unbelievably shitty swords.

Only three remained. He gave them no time to decide whether they would flee or fight. Moving forward with speed they could not follow the shade wearing figure wove through their guards stabbing the two in the front through their backs piercing them both through their hearts. One of the swords broke and he dropped it as he let his momentum carry him forward towards his final opponent, reaching to grasp hi blade with both hands drawing it out of the corps as it fell.

The last man, the leader, prided himself on being a capable warrior, he had never felt fear. Looking at the figure coming towards him ready to deliver the final blow, his shades had fallen slightly down his face revealing his eyes to him… and he felt fear. It was the last thing he felt before his world went black.

-o0O0o-

One minute twenty three seconds. That is how long it took to slay his assailants. He had broken three swords, four counting his opponent's. He walked over to the corpse of the leader retrieving its blade. As he picked it up it snapped in half, five swords. God damn it, it kept happening. He was tempted to believe his brother cursed him or something. He couldn't even touch a damn sword without breaking the thing. Either that or every sword he was ever going to come across was going to be an unbelievably fragile piece of shit.

He sighed. When he found his brother he was going to kick his ass and hopefully this bullshit would stop. If not he was going to do a fucking acrobatic pirouette off the god damn handle. It would be the most beautiful pirouette ever done. Every ballerina in history would break into tears of envy. They would cry themselves a whole new ocean, maps would have to be redrawn. Simply put, this could not keep happening.

He had been looking for his bro for a few years now, couldn't find the damn guy. Plenty of assholes though. Turning to the fallen men he- akdhgfsjciluewfhnweFCsdvfSGFYVBfDS

HOLY SHIT! GOD- Oh. It's just you Cal. didn't see you there.

We cool? Of course we are. Lil Cal is the man.

He turned back to his previous task and gathered up all the blades that were unbroken, ten swords by his count, and placed them all in his basket. He also pocketed all the money they had on them. With the rate he burned through swords he couldn't let any weapon go unclaimed, he would need all the blades he could get. As he picked up the last sword he caught someone looking at him in the reflection in the sword.

He whipped around quickly trying to spot the sneaky little puppet but could find neither hide nor hair of the little dude. It didn't matter though he'll show up soon enough.

He went on his way to the docks, he would probably hit up one of the inns for a drink and some rest, and then he was getting off the island. He had already spent too much time here; it was quite obvious that his bro was not here.

-o0O0o-

Atop a nearby roof a puppet hangs limply from the arms of an impeccably cool dude. He was impressed with his Lil' Bro's ability.

He wasn't ready to fight him though.

Dave Strider, his little bro. he looked forward to the day they crossed clades again. He would not interfere with his brother's journey though. Striders got to learn to stride on their own. And it was time Dave strider learned to stride.

The cool dude vanished in a blur leaving no evidence that he was ever there.


	5. Brawl

Dave sat at the bar of small inn near the docks. His basket resting on the ground by his feet, his shades sat on his face despite the dim lighting in the room, an ice cold beer in front of him. He was surprised the bar had an ice box but was equally disappointed that they did not have apple juice so it evened out. He still appreciated an ice cold brew every once in a while.

As was usual when he was in such an establishment he kept his eyes open anything interesting to keep him entertained and his ears open for news of his brother. It shouldn't be hard to hear rumors of the greatest swordsman in all the planes of the medium. He would follow the rumors and inevitably be disappointed by either finding a cold trail or an imposter that he had to put down. He knew everyone wanted to be a strider but really there could only be one, and at the moment there was one too many. He never really understood that saying really there could easily be two, it was no biggie. Dave was pleasantly surprised when he started hearing rumors about himself, there weren't many but he had heard some. But at the moment he was paying attention to the people around him, eaves dropping on their conversations. One in particular grabbed his attention.

"How did you get off anyway?" A Grey skinned woman asked a well-tanned human who looked like he had just sailed through a storm by the looks of his hair.

"A dude who dressed in a hula costume helped me out." Dave's mouth twitched. Sure he knew that he was taking the context but little things like the truth never got in the way of good comedy.

"Huh?" the sailor's companion asked eloquently.

"Said he needed a break or something. We there for a while before we finally got off…" Dave tried to suppress his snort. "…the island."

"Why was this guy in a hula costume?"

"Said something about it being 'ironic'?" Dave's ears perked up at this, or they would have if he was a dog which he wasn't "He had a cool pair of shades." That synched it. That sounded like his brother. "It's been months though." Dave's hopes died. Another cold trail and he didn't even follow it to the end.

"Huh. Quite a story." The Jotenn said sounding only half interested. "I need something to Driiiiiiiink! Joooooooohn I'm getting a beer or 8, do you waaaaaaaant one?"

"No I'm fine. I just have one question and then a word of caution. Have you ever read a picture book called little monsters?" The Jotenn hadn't but Dave had. It was a terrible book. So bad it **had** to be read. It nearly ruined Apple juice for him. Oh god. The beer, was that guy suggesting that someone put piss in the beer?

Dave tried to shake the thought; the beer was sealed before he got it. No way in hell someone did that. Nope. Not possible. No way. Dave lifted the bottle to his lips to take a sip despite what the stranger named John had said. Don't think about blue monster piss. DAMNIT, it's like saying not to think about a pink elephant, of course he's gonna think about it. All he can think about is a frothing bottle of gross monster piss. DAMNIT!

Dave put the bottle back down while schooling his features, which had twisted into an expression of complete and utter disgust, into his usual stoic expression. He sighed through his nose letting his eyes room the room looking for something interesting to distract him. He did not have to wait long however as an oddity walked through the doors into the bar room, a Mer.

Mer don't usually show up in this plane considering the generally poor quality of the water, Dave wouldn't swim in it and these fishy bipedals had to breathe the shit.

She, from what Dave could tell it was a she, wore a wraparound skirt and a tank top. Her skin was shimmering and translucent and covered in phosphorescent spots of fuchsia. She looked like she was made of glass. Dave knew better however, Mer were tough, tough enough to kick his ass at least. He was wondering what she was doing in this little town, the Mer were probably the least liked of the non-human races.

To both his surprise and frustration she was called over by the Jotenn who was talking to that John guy, which brought his mind back to the topic he was trying to distract himself from. He put the beer he was about to take a sip from down, he could not in good conscious drink it with monsters on his mind.

Dave took note of the venomous looks the Mer was getting from various drunks and thugs. One table in particular seemed to be itching to draw their weapons. Another table was eying them warily, waiting for them to start something. Dave felt the tension in the air, the bar had become a powder keg, and it just needed a spark to set it off. Dave was of half a mind to provide that spark, he knew that the racists were going to be on the losing side and watching them get their asses handed to them would be fun. He wouldn't though, no matter who won it was still a shitty thing to do.

The table of thugs got up and started making their way across the room towards the group that had arrested Dave's attention for the past couple minutes. The show as about to start and he was getting comfortable to laugh his ass off. Then his vision was blocked a group of men who looked familiar.

The group of twenty all wore clothes of the same style and carried cutlasses and knives on their person. Their style was familiar but he couldn't quite place where he had seen it before.

"So you're the punk with the basket I've been hearin' about. You did quite a number on my men." The leader said. He was wearing a very large and pirate-y hat. Dave idly considered wearing one for ironic purposes, he'd put it on his to do list right under bleating like a goat. "tell you what, Join my crew and we won't turn you into fish food. How's that sound?"

Dave looked the group over and was not happy to see that a number of them had pistols at their hips; a couple even had them out. Dave was fast, he could probably get out of the way of some of the bullets but they were really close and he doubted he would have time to dodge all of them. Dave being Dave however decided he would kick the bear because simply poking it would not be enough. "Dude seriously? Have you seen the disgusting ass water? There aren't any fish to feed. There are probably better things you could use all the top quality meat you'd get from me. Like a barbeque, wouldn't be hard just throw a slab on a rock and watch it burst into flames"

The captain stood there stupidly trying to figure out if what Dave said was a 'no'. Dave saw out of the corner of his eye that he was not the only one having trouble. That 'John' guy and his two non-human companions were being harassed by the group of racists. Another table was straining to get up to come to their aid. The bar was no longer a powder keg, it was a nuclear reactor and this place was about to become Chernobyl. Dave wondered what a nuclear was but dismissed it as one of his brains many inventions.

Dave locked eyes with John, who immediately broke out in a mischievous and buck toothed smile. John reached down and grabbed a frothing mug of monster piss… Beer. He meant beer. John cocked his arm back and Dave immediately knew the bar was about to become ground zero. Not that he minded, at least he wasn't going to get shot. He would rather not add himself to his collection of dead things.

**-o0 minutes in the past but not many 0o-**

"Why is everything red?" John asked Vriska as they left the ship. It had been a week since they finally made it through the medium and he was glad to have left but this plane was… not the nicest place he had been. "Even the water is red. And why is it so Hot?"

"Volcanic rock and large Iron deposits. The water is red because it's full of rust." Vriska said by scrunching her nose in disgust. She looked up to the sun that blazed a violent red through the volcanic haze. "And yeah it fucking hoooooooot. I don't understand how anyone would live here."

They walked down the docks towards and inn. Entering it they immediately grabbed a table. Not any table in particular just the first open one they came to.

"At least this island has people on it. Unlike the last one you dropped me off on." John said in a jokingly accusing way.

Vriska rolled her eyes. "I h8 to br8k it to you but we hardly knew you. And besiiiiiiiides when you turned down our offer you did say to drop you off at the first island." John looked at Vriska with an uncharacteristically deadpan expression; he just knew that it was revenge for not joining the crew. "How did you get off anyway?" Vriska asked

"A dude who dressed in a hula costume helped me out." John said, his smile returning.

"Huh?" Vriska asked eloquently.

"Said he needed a break or something, we were there for a while before we finally got of…" John though her heard someone snort. "…the island."

"Why was he in a hula costume?" Vriska asked no longer really interested in the island so much as this apparent weirdo.

"Said something about it being 'ironic'?" John said his voice made the statement almost sound like a question. He did not understand the strangers reasoning then and still didn't now."It's been months though."

"Huh. Quite a story." Vriska said losing interest, she thought the antics described sounded familiar for some reason. "I need something to Driiiiiiiink! Joooooooohn I'm getting a beer or 8, do you waaaaaaaant one?"

"No I'm fine. I just have one question and then a word of caution. Have you ever read a picture book called little monsters?"

Vriska shook her head. John decided to have mercy on her. But he did notice someone at the bar's face contort into a mask of disgust as he put hi beer down. He was pale almost as if he had never spent any time in the sun. He was of average height and wore very nice dress clothes and… sandals? A pair of shades shielded his eyes from view and a large basket rested at his feet. John laughed to himself, he would abandon tormenting Vriska seeing as he already had one victim.

Just then a woman walked in. A least John though it was a woman, there was something feminine about the creature despite the lack of the usually indicators. Her skin was pail and looked like frosted glass that shimmered in the light with glowing spots of fuchsia arrayed across her skin and duller marks of the color under her skin. Instead of hair she had a large and wild main of octopus like tentacles that were long enough to almost touch the floor. Her face was surprisingly human in appearance the only difference being a little bump where her nose should have been. The end result was like a n octopus and jellyfish and a human had all had a kid somehow.

"What is that?" John asked.

"hmmmmmmmm?" Vriska looked in the direction he was looking. "Oh Her, why don't I call her over and you can ask. HEY FEFERI! OVER HERE!"

The woman turned to look at Vriska with eyes that reflected the dim light like a cat's breaking out into a smile at the sight of the Jotenn. "VRISKA! )(ey )(ow are you?"

"I'm Goooooooood. This dork's never seen a Mer before." Vriska said jerking her head in John's direction.

John pouted. "It's not my fault, where I lived was boring. So you're a Mer? I'm John." John said smiling as he held out his hand which the Mer promptly took.

"I'm Feferi. Nice to meet you." Feferi said with a wide smile, prominently displaying large shark like teeth. John didn't seemed fazed by this. "I'm surprised thoug)(, not many )(umans are so nice w)(en t)(ey meet us." There was something in the way she said her Hs that John found amusing though he would never be able to say just what it was.

"Why's that?" John asked. He was aware that nonhuman races were not treated all that well but many humans didn't have a problem with it.

"Maybe it's the way we are born." Feferi answered.

"Huh?"

"our species practices adelp)(op)(agy. (adelphophagy, real thing. Some sharks do it)" Feferi supplied.

"Umm." John still didn't get it.

"She 8 her siblings." Vriska said, seeing as john wasn't going to get it anytime soon.

**(AN: I needed a reason humans don't like them besides being fishy and no one likes a cannibal so yeah. Creepy I know but if you don't like it that only means it's doing its job. Might have to up the rating though.)**

"Eh? Why? Were you hungry?" John asked looking at Feferi with a puzzled expression.

"It's )(ow we are born, my mot)(er had a bunc)( of c)(ildren by different fat)(ers and we eat eac)( ot)(er until our mot)(er only gives birt)( to the survivor."

"Huh?" John said again. He had a vague idea of what they were saying but really couldn't wrap his head around the idea.

"It's a battle royal to see who gets to be born." Vriska said. "Personally I think it's effective. Weed out the week before they are born."

"Oh." John said slightly put off at the thought. "You must be pretty strong then, huh?" John said his usual smile returning.

"s)(ell I don't like to boats…" Feferi said slightly embarrassed. John laughed at the puns; it seemed everyone he was going to meet was going to have a verbal quirk of some kind. Before John could comment however he and his companions were approached by a large group of thugs.

"What are ye doin here fishy?" one of them asked. He was missing quite a few teeth.

"Yer kind en't wanted here." Another said.

"Hey!" John said standing up to the group, he was a head taller than most of them. Over their heads he could see another group of men harassing the pale dude at the bar. He locked eyed with him or he felt that he did, it was hard to tell though the shades. John suddenly got a devious smirk as he picked up one of the beers that Vriska had ordered. "Hey man what are you doing with my beer!?" John shouted as he flung the beer across the bar. It hit one of the men and spilled beer all over their leader.

Vriska, ever quick on the uptake grinned before shouting. "Are you just gonna t8ke that?!"

An irate and sopping wet thug spun around nearly frothing at the mouth. "WHO DID THAT?!"

John and Vriska both pointed at a random man in the group of racists who had been harassing them. "He did!" and then all hell broke loose. The thug pulled out a pistol and fired into the crowed before leaping forward fist cocked back, his men were not far behind. Some still tried to go for the pale dude but got fists in the face for their effort, he made it look classy too. The two groups were now in full blow conflict with each other. Chairs and tables were smashed and brawlers thrown across the room. Gun shots went off but no one was getting hit.

Vriska's crew who had been sitting at a nearby table leapt to their feet and joined the fray laughing as they did so. Equius was breaking limbs as he plowed his way through the throng, sweating profusely at the sight of so many bodies so close together.

John sent a thug flying through the air and crashing into a group of people who were sneaking up on Vriska who had a hand to her temple as she watched with sadistic glee while a group of men smashed bottles into their own faces. Feferi, who had at first been hesitant to start a fight, was now slapping anyone who got close to her with enough force to break their jaws. "DON'T GLUBBING GLUB WIT)( ME GLUBBING **MOT)(ERGLUBBER**!" John was surprised; he didn't think she was that violent.

A group of men had climbed onto Equius's back and were trying to force him to the ground, while they were not even a little bit successful it was obvious from the way the big guy was sweating that he had no intention of getting them off anytime soon. John picked up a round table and broke its stand off, twisting his body he succeeded in throwing the table like a Frisbee, he didn't aim it very well so the projectile ended up connecting with and carrying Equius and his assailants across the room and through the wall. John wasn't concerned he knew he could take it. John picked up the table's stand again and proceeded to clobber his enemies with it like a hammer, he had his hammer with him but he didn't see any reason to bring it out for a simple bar fight.

John found himself back to back with the dude in the shades, who was currently wielding two chair legs as improvised swords and had a large pirate-y looking hat on his head. apparently the thugs that had been harassing him earlier had some buddies nearby as both he and john found themselves surrounded by more men than they thought were in the room originally. "Hey numb nuts thanks for the party. How did you know it was my birth day? You could have warned me before throwing it; I almost didn't have enough time to get my party hat." The shades wearing stranger drawled.

"Heh heh. Your welcome! I'm John by the way, nice to meet you." John said while delivering a devastating left right hook a charging thug, sending him careening into a small group of others.

"Dave. And I was being sarcastic." The now named Dave said delivering a series of strikes to three men that left them gasping for breath on the floor.

"I Know!" John said with his massive smile in place as he grabbed and head butted a particularly large thug causing the thug to stumble into Dave's space dazed and with a broken nose. Dave punched him in the diaphragm making him fall to the ground coughing. "But it looks like you're enjoying the party to me."

Dave shrugged. "Right you caught me. Nice move with the beer by the way." He commented tripping a thug who stumbled into johns space, john promptly elbowed him knocking him out cold. A very large Jotenn who was almost as large as Equius charged Dave. Dave spun under johns arm as he turned delivering a haymaker to the oversized thug. "Wanna join forces? It would be like some cheesy superhero shit."

"Aren't we already doing that?" John asked spinning in a circle with his table leg out stretched causing all the enemies around them to jump back, Dave ducked safely under it.

"I thought it was worth asking." Dave said jumping in to the air and snapping off a double round house kick to the heads of two thugs who thought they could overpower him while he was crouching. Dave then watched as John punted a full grown man through a wall before tossing another behind him taking out the thugs trying to sneak up on Dave. "Freaky strength dude."

"Family tradition so my dad says." John shrugged kicking a idle chair into the face of another charging enemy. Dave noticed a large group of tightly knit enemies with their swords drawn approaching the Mer's unprotected back..

"Cool. Can I borrow it for a second?" John nodded before swinging his club in a circle again. Dave jumped onto it while it was still swinging and used it as a spring board to launch himself at incredible speed towards the armed. Spinning his body in mid-air he succeeded in dodging their attempts to fillet him and striking several of them in the head before landing with his sandal pressed in one of their faces. He spun around delivering a series of kicks and "sword" strikes that the last of the enemies nearby.

By this time the fighting was largely over as anyone who wasn't knocked out decided to cut their losses and run. John, Vriska, Dave, Feferi, and Equius were quick to leave knowing that the guards would be arriving shortly now that the fighting was over. They each grabbed various kegs and bottles of alcohol before they left, most of the bar was wrecked, who would notice a few missing bottles.

"Hehehaahahaaha! Nice one John!" Vriska cackled "I couldn't have done it better myself. AND LOOK AT ALL THIS FREEEEEEEE BOOZE!" Vriska flicked the cap off a beer and promptly chugged it on the spot before erupting into giggles again.

"you two were krilly good! You made a great team." Feferi complimented Dave and John.

"Like you had fought together all your lives in fact." Equius said using a towel to wipe the sweat from his face.

"Dude we should team up!" John said enthusiastically.

"Nah, I'm good." Dave answered in a bored drawl.

"Awe why not?"

"Because I'm looking for someone. We can't both team up if we're both doing our own thing."

"But I'm not doing anything. I promise I won't get in the way! Please?" John pleaded.

"Fuck, fine I guess it wouldn't be that bad." Dave gave in.

"Awe Joooooooohn your leaving again?" Vriska whined, throwing in a pout for good measure.

"Yep! Being with the crew is fun but I don't really want to be a pirate." John responded sincerely

"Whatever." Vriska huffed. "I better see you again." She said with a threatening glare towards john.

"Ok ok. I Promise."

"So got any destination in mind?" Dave asked. "I don't really feel like chilling on this island much longer."

"OOO)( you can travel wit)( me!" Feferi butted in excitedly.

"And where are you going?" Dave asked, he needed a destination after all.

"I'm traveling to see my older sister! S)(e's in LODAG."

"I'm fine with that!" John said happily.

"Good a place as any." Dave said shifting his basket on his shoulder before putting his hands in his pockets. "But we ain't leaving 'till morning and we just came from destroying pirate bed n' breakfast." Dave looked around at every one. "ANY Ya'll got a place we could crash?"


	6. probably fine

"Glub glub glub~" Fereri sang to herself. Her feet kicking over the edge of the small boat her and her two companions were sailing on. It was a red skiff perhaps 14 feet in length with a single triangular sail. Dave had said it was his but she couldn't help but think that he had probably stolen it. He was traveling alone and didn't even seem to know how to tie a proper knot, the skiff definitely wasn't his. But he had dubbed it the SS. Beast rider for some reason (be - a - Strider).

They had all gone back to the Mind Fang the night before with Vriska and gotten insanely plastered with all the booze they had appropriated from the bar, and they were all sporting hangovers. At least she assumed they were john looked about as bad as she felt but Dave still had the same stoic expression so it was hard to tell at a glance but he kept quiet so he must have been sporting a headache at least. John seemed the worst off, he couldn't hold his liquor the night before and it seemed to hit him twice as hard in the morning.

The three were so disoriented that morning that they had almost forgotten the new crew member for the mind fang. She was tall Jotenn, about as tall as john actually, but sported a lithe frame. She almost seemed regal and had spoken in an even tone that the three appreciated as it did not aggravate their headaches when she woke them up that morning. She had introduced herself to the captain the night before as Kanaya and she seemed pleased when she was accepted. They had only met and talked to her briefly and unnfortunately they could only just barely remember her.

"Where are we even going?" Dave drawled sounding bored.

"shell we can't get to LODAG from LO)(AC, so we have to go to LOLAR first." Feferi explained. She had asked Vriska the night before how to get to LODAG and she had explained that if they wanted to sail there directly it they would have to wait six months for the planes to align. So they would have to hop in order to get there. She wasn't a navigator so she didn't understand why but she trusted Vriska.

"Cool. How long will that take?" Dave asked again laying down on one of the benches.

"A month to do the whole trip." John said. He was currently kneeling on the floor covering his head from the sun while he rested it on the side of the boat.

"Do we even have enough food to make this trip?" dave queried "we ain't gonna have to eat each other are we? I've never had Human or fish person before and I ain't all that eager to try. And no offence to the occupants of LOHAC but the water here is shit, I don't think we could catch a guppy in these waters. The water here might as well be lava."

"I can't even go for a swim. Glub…" Feferi said sounding slightly depressed.

"Oh shit. Do we have to keep you from drying out like a beached whale or some shit? Or are you cool? I Know just about nothing about your species. Do you need to hydrate your skin or some shit? Your not going to get all dry and wrinkly are you?" Dave said, noticing that Feferi was looking at him angrily.

"Dave…" John said from his position at the back of the boat. "You do realize you insulted a ladies weight and age in the same line of questioning right?" John's Nana had hammered lessons into Johns head on how to treat a lady apparently she had to deal with someone who was quite inept at this particular field and "would be damned if she let her grandson follow in his footsteps" as she put it. needless to say age and weight were two things he had been warned to never mention

"hmm?" Dave asked. "Oh. Yeah sorry about that." He didn't sound sorry. "but really should we be worried?"

"No, I'll be fin." Feferi answered. She was still angry but deciding not to inflict pain upon her companion.

"We still haven't answered the food question." Dave pointed out now that that was taken care of.

"We will make port in LOLAR in a week and we have enough to ration before then so we should be fine." John answered.

"'Should be'? dude, whenever someone says 'should be fine' it usually ain't."

"No no, don't worry man, it will be fine." John assured the shades wearing blond.

-o0O0o-

It was not fine.

They ran out of food three days before they had even seen the island and the only reason they had any energy at all was because they still had enough water to keep hydrated.

They had sailed through the Void and arrived in the sunny and oddly cool plane of LOLAR. It was very bright and the sky seemed to constantly release some form of rain or another but didn't have many clouds. John had immediately went to work catching dinner for them but what he caught was so disturbingly… pink that everyone aboard had been glad when it was thrown back overboard.

They docked and as quickly as their tired legs could carry them ran to the nearest pub before ordering enough food to feed ten of them. They ate like they had never even seen food before in their life. Once their stomachs were no longer making their displeasure known to them they ate at a more sedate pace Dave and john engaged in a sword fight with their French fries despite the joking nature of the "fight" Dave still dominated.

"dude! Don't eat my fries!" John shouted in indignation as Dave shoveled a handful of his fries into his mouth.

"MY fries. You lost." Dave said simply before taking the entire tray and dumping it onto his plate

John huffed before taking a large bite of the fried fish on his plate. It didn't seem right to have it without the chips though.

"it's ok John. You can )(have some my fish if it will make you feel better." Feferi offered.

"No thank you." John said, he had plenty of fish he wanted his fries back.

"Oh… Dave you can have my fish. If you give me some fries." She did not seem to want to eat the fish for some reason they watched her tear into the chicken fingers they bought like… a shark into its prey but she wouldn't touch the fish, weird.

"sure. Here." He said taking the fish and passing her a handful of fries. Feferi gleefully started munching on the fries, her hair(tentacles) curling and uncurling as a sign she was happy, the way a cats tail curls when its happy. John was disappointed she didn't offer him any of the fries, they were his originally.

"Dude what are you doing!?" john asked as he watch Dave dip his fries in mayonnaise

"What? Its mayo. Don't be hating on the mayo dude." He answered popping another mayo covered fry into his mouth.

"no dude, mayo on fries is wrong."

"why does every body hate on the mayo? It never hurt anybody. Ketchup is wrong mayo is sweet and innocent and godly delicious. (AN: I agree with Dave)" Dave answered moving to eat another fry before a melodic voice rang out, grabbing their attention.

"hello mister Strider."


	7. one upmanship

The young woman had needed a drink. She needed one, she clinically needed a martini. Even a bottle of cheap beer would not be unwelcome. She was not sure exactly when it had happened she had become her mother, alcohol dependency and all. Perhaps it happened when her sister had run away from home. Ever since then, or maybe it was ever since she started her addiction, she had seemingly lost the ability to make well thought out decisions for no matter what she did she always made the wrong ones.

Now here she was in a land that far too bright to be comfortable and too colorful to look at without vomiting (or at least in her experience anyway) pretending not to be an alcoholic while searching for her run away sister. Or really here she was in a bar pretending not to be hungover while starting up a conversation with a familiar set of shades.

"Hello mister strider." It took all of her considerable control not to wince at the volume of her own voice but she was pleased to note she pulled it off.

"Of all the Pubs in all the techno-colored planes in the entire Medium you had to walk into this one. Sup Lalonde." The shades said in their usual drawl.

"Oh. I did not have to walk into this one but I must say it was a happy coincidence that I did. Who might your friends be?" The young woman said looking to the shade's two companions Messy hair and fuchsia.

"Hmm? Oh they are my travel buddies I guess. The big guy is John and the shark on legs is Feferi." Feferi gave Shades an angry glare for the shark comment that he promptly ignored.

"I was under the impression that Striders were proverbial lone wolves. Is that no longer the case?" the woman asked raising a delicate blonde eyebrow. Her poise was simply a ruse however as she was currently dealing with the onset of a rather intense migraine.

"Yeah and I found out why this past week." Shades said turning slightly to look at John.

"Oh come on Dave! Feferi eats a lot more than I thought!" John said indignantly

")(EY!"

"Sorry Feferi. And besides aren't you going to introduce us to your friend?" John asked looking to the woman. "Have a seat, I'll get you a drink. On me." At the mention of alcohol The woman was very quick to take a seat at their table.

"Thank you. I am Rose Lalonde. And I would love a drink if you would not mind terribly, anything is fine." Rose tried to ignore the faint tones of desperation in her voice. Strider had noticed it judging by the way his brow quirked ever so slightly upward. He did not comment however, a rare moment of consideration from the man to be sure, but then again rose was sure he was storing the information away to use as ammunition at a later point in the conversation.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Rose. Here." John said passing her a glass of what appeared to be rum or whisky. Taking a sip Rose was met with the sweat flavour of rum. Already her headache was receding.

"Once again, thank you." Turning back to Dave, Rose continued where they had left off. "I must admit being out at sea without food sounds like quite the harrowing experience. But I must ask why you have chosen to travel with companions? I do not recall you offering me such an opportunity."

"They were insistent. The strider charm was simply irresistible." Dave said leaning back in his seat with his hand behind his head. John snorted at his comment and Feferi rolled her eyes.

"You seem at ease with the apparent attention you are receiving such attention from a member of your own gender, or from a member of a completely different species from yourself." Rose said mockingly.

"I find it flattering really. You know you're doing something right when even a shark babe takes notice of you." Dave said.

"Shark? She is more like an octopus than a shark. I do not believe sharks have prehensile appendages even remotely resembling tentacles. Nor do they have such attractive florescent coloring for that matter." Rose said eyeing Feferi as the girl in question tried to figure out if she should take offence to Rose's comments or not.

"Oh here you go with your squid fetish." Dave said

"Ummm." John said already lost in their banter

"I do not recall mentioning squids at any time in this conversation."

"You know what I mean. Tentacles, suckers, and other morbid shit like that."

"Uhhh. Guys…" John said quietly trying to change the topic.

"I believe we have gotten dreadfully off topic." Rose said taking her queue from John.

"I believe you are trying to change the subject." Dave countered. "But to answer your question, I didn't have any destination in mind and these guys had one, so now we are going to the same place. It was easier to tag along with them really."

"I see. And how goes your search anyway?" Rose inquired.

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I would say he's like a ninja but then I have to remind myself that he is one."

"I had thought he was a samurai."

"Nah that my deal."

"ah Dave ever endeavoring to separate yourself from your brother's shadow."

"Yeah. Can we not talk about this? What about your own search? Any word on your sister or are you just boozing around? You chose a terrible place to do it by the way." Dave said with a slight hint of venom in his words.

"I have seen neither hide nor hair of my sister. But from what I gathered she has become quite the accomplished cat burglar." Rose said purposely avoiding Dave's jab at her alcoholism. She wasn't even that drunk yet.

Sensing the hostility that was beginning to mount between the two John and Feferi decided it was time to step in. "So I take it you aren't from LOLAR then?" John asked.

"Are you traveling like us?" Feferi asked

"I am traveling in fact. And no I am not from LOLAR" Rose supplied picking up her third glass of rum since sitting down. She had become quite good at pretending she wasn't drunk. She would only start to slur her words when she was well and truly plastered, she was a long way off from that threshold however. "Searching for my wayward sister if you have not already gathered such from my conversation with my acquaintance here."

"What does she look like? In case I come across her." John asked. "I could let her know you're looking for her."

"Like myself mostly. Except her eyes are a bright pink as opposed to my own lavender. I do not have much more for you to work with as I have not seen her in some time" Rose supplied. "however I doubt you will come across her or that making her aware of my pursuit would help, but the sentiment is appreciated all the same."

Feferi noticed something from Rose's conversation with their rather rude companion. "If you are )(ooking for your sister than w)(o is Dave )(ooking for?"

"don't…" Dave began but was overridden by Rose in her quest to one up Dave for his previous comments, even the score as it were.

"He is looking for the number one swordsmen in all the known planes Dirk "Bro" Strider, his older brother." Rose said. Dave would have scowled if he did not have perfect control of every muscle in his face.

"Oh. Why didn't you say anything?" John asked. Dave was glad to note that John's tone was only curious and not accusational.

"You never asked. And it was my business anyway." Dave drawled projecting an uninterested façade.

"What Dave means to say is that he has some minor trust issues and that it would probably have been several months before he would have told you."

"Thank you for your translation Lalonde." Dave said sarcastically.

"Your welcome."

"I )(ope you both fin w)(o you are )(ooking for." Feferi offered trying to stear them away from another verbal battle. It was clear however that she only meant it for Rose and could care less for the rude Dave.

"I know why don't you join us?" John proposed excitedly.

"I am afraid I will have to decline your offer. It sounds as if the three of you are already having trouble in your travels without myself adding to the burden. And I am sorry to inform you but I already have a destination in mind. I shall even be leaving for it shortly."

"Oh w)(ale are you )(eading?" Fefferi asked

"I shall be going to LOLCAT in hopes that my sister will be passing through as it aligns five other planes for a two month duration."

John would have pressed further but with such a polite refusal he found it hard to do so. "wow. You sound like you know where you're going and why. You must be quite the navigator." John complimented.

"Thank you John, it is good of you to say that. I am merely well versed in the planar studies. I had been studying the Planes and the Medium in college in fact before I had set out."

"Neat." John said not sure what to say.

"Indeed it is. I could probably go into a rather lengthy discussion on it at a later date as it appears I must be going or I shall miss my boat." Rose said as she glanced at a delicate time keeping device she had hidden in the folds of her robe like orange dress.

"Oh alright I suppose we shall meet again." John said shaking her hand as she got up from her seat.

"Bye Rose! It was so Nice to meet you!" Feferi said. Despite not having spoken much to the woman in the first place.

"Likewise, Feferi." Rose said politely

"see ya Lalonde.

"Strider." Rose said inclining her head.

"Oh Rose you should know that some friends of ours will be heading to LOLCAT soon. If you happen to meet a Jotenn named Vriska be sure you tell her I say hi alright?" John said.

"I suppose it would not be too much trouble provided we cross paths. Is there a particular reason I should?" Rose asked.

"Not really. It might just help you avoid some trouble is all."

"I will be sure to remember that. Take care." Rose said finally before leaving the bar.

"Who's getting the bill?" Dave asked.

"You should since you ate my fries." John said.

"Nah man you should since you offered to pay for Lalonde's drinks." Dave said

"W)(y don't we split the bill?" Feferi interjected.

"Nah." John and Dave said in unison.

"Ok. I'll get it." John said "you guys go on ahead I'll catch up."

Dave looked at him before a smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth. "Sure thing. Come on Sharktapus."

Feferi huffed but followed Dave out all the same. A few minutes later John came out walking casually. However as he came up to them he and Dave suddenly picked up their pace, Feferi did not know why but she felt like the two of them were trying to get away from the bar for some reason.

When they were already several blocks away and long out of sight the door to the bar burst open and the chef came out wielding a cleaver. "WHERE DID THOSE BASTARDS GO?! NO ONE SKIPPS OUT ON THE BILL IN MY JOINT! WHERE ARE THEY?!"


End file.
